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Author Topic: You might be a redneck if: Back to Topics
JCS319

Champion Author
Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 6, 2009 10:27:51 PM

Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 30, 2015 1:15:28 AM

You think the freeway is the back door of the movie theater.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 29, 2015 1:27:09 AM

You place a classified asking less than $1.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 28, 2015 1:12:26 AM

Your kids learned to shoot before they learned to walk.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 27, 2015 1:25:00 AM

You've ever parked your date next to a YIELD sign hoping she'd take the hint.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 26, 2015 1:48:26 AM

You think the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 24, 2015 3:30:03 AM

Your bumper sticker reads "If you're missing your cat, look in my treads. "
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 23, 2015 2:15:02 AM

Duct tape and wire are the only two things holding your truck together.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 21, 2015 2:01:53 AM

The idea for the Budweiser frogs came from listening to you and your friends trying to read the label on the bottle.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 20, 2015 1:55:29 AM

You have more tires in your yard than on your trucks.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 18, 2015 3:11:04 AM

You've ever invited friends over to show off what's left of the squirrel that you shot with your deer gun
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 17, 2015 2:58:22 PM

Your driveway is two tire tracks with grass growing down the middle.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 15, 2015 10:44:01 PM

People ask your wife when her baby's due and she's not pregnant.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 14, 2015 11:17:20 PM

You don't change your socks until the first pair rots off.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 14, 2015 2:15:49 AM

You need a dictionary to spell your name.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 11, 2015 10:40:09 PM

You put a Clapper on your headlights.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 10, 2015 3:05:02 AM

You think OFF is a fine smelling cologne.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 10, 2015 2:50:48 AM

You can identify your friends by the sound of their mufflers.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 2, 2015 1:14:35 AM

Your husband spray paints the upholstery of your car to make it look new.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Jan 1, 2015 2:50:41 AM

You think 'possum is the "other white meat".
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 30, 2014 3:02:28 AM

You're 42 and still have clowns come to your birthday party.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 29, 2014 3:46:00 AM

You go to garage sales to shop for Christmas gifts.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 27, 2014 3:02:24 AM

You refer to the Surgeon General's Warning on a pack of cigarettes as your medical encyclopedia.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 27, 2014 2:58:04 AM

You think "Dueling Banjos" is classical music.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 26, 2014 3:38:38 AM

You only bathe when it rains.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 26, 2014 2:48:14 AM

You can't take a bath in the winter 'cause the stream is frozen.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 24, 2014 4:14:46 AM

Your master bathroom has the words "porta" and "potty" written on the side.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 24, 2014 1:28:12 AM

Any time your kids see a dog they get out their ropes and lasso it and tackle it to the ground.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 22, 2014 12:29:10 AM

Your gun cabinet takes up half your living room.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 20, 2014 3:07:11 AM

You get up EARLY on Saturday to go yard sale shopping for entertainment.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 20, 2014 1:59:24 AM

You save old kitchen appliances for target practice.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 19, 2014 1:37:19 AM

You stop to flirt with the person running the drive through at McDonalds.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 16, 2014 12:20:38 AM

You're wearing a camoflauge jacket and dipping in your driver's license pic.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 14, 2014 10:57:39 PM

You picket your horses on your lawn so you won't have to mow it.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 13, 2014 3:25:59 AM

Your idea of heaven involves two shotguns and a keg of beer.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 13, 2014 2:47:42 AM

Your dungarees expose more than half of your crack in the back because the weight of your pocket knife.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 11, 2014 2:20:57 AM

You've ever given a set of Tupperware ice tea glasses as a wedding present.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 8, 2014 10:32:26 PM

If you think Purina is some kind of Ex-Lax.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 8, 2014 12:59:01 AM

If you are 20 and you can still go in McDonald's playhouse.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 6, 2014 3:07:18 AM

You wore a baseball cap to the opera.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 6, 2014 2:41:11 AM

You consider your annual bath one too many.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 5, 2014 12:25:15 AM

Your whole family sleeps in the same bed.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 3, 2014 10:39:08 PM

You use the water in your toilet to bob for apples.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Dec 2, 2014 9:28:38 PM

Your dog's shots are up to date but your children's aren't.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 30, 2014 3:25:38 AM

You think its okay to have your 6 year old babysit your 5, 4, and 3 year olds.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 28, 2014 3:03:46 AM

The fire department leaves after discovering that the fire that destroyed y.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 28, 2014 2:47:17 AM

Your favorite cologne smells like exhaust.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 25, 2014 1:25:48 AM

You think the ATM machine is a giant, public calculator.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 23, 2014 3:42:22 AM

Your mama has more tattoos than you do.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 23, 2014 1:51:38 AM

Your friend tells you he went online last night, and you think he took a drunk driving test.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 20, 2014 10:41:55 PM

You go to a wedding or any formal party and ask someone to pull your finger.
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JCS319
Champion Author Tacoma

Posts:28,547
Points:3,281,335
Joined:Dec 2005
Message Posted: Nov 19, 2014 12:09:56 AM

Your best Sunday clothes include your John Deere baseball cap.
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