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cheapmonkee

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Portland

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Message Posted: Jul 5, 2005 9:30:10 PM

Welcome to the club. Even you young pups can stop on by as long as you mind your manners. There may be snow on the roof but there's a fire that ol' diablo would covet in the furnace so watch out!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 27, 2014 9:21:09 AM

Happy Thanksgiving Geezers

Yep, Maggie put on quite a spread, and as a result, I'll end up with a bigger spread. Thanx Maggie! Yer the best!!!!

Pass the jug. I'm gonna get started on the after dinner hooch!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 27, 2014 8:58:26 AM

BUUUUUUUURRRRRPPPPP!

That was good!
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 26, 2014 8:24:45 PM

Geezer you can't be trusted with a marker but you are cute! BG tell Mrs BG there isn't much to worry about, I'll show her the walk and then she can parade around the house for you when ever you want! Hey big boys My kitchen smells so good with all the cooking and baking we did today I'am loving it! Hey NN are you ready for some down home cooking and a day of football. Hi Chris oh your happiness at the table is so sweet, hope you like sweet potato's! Oh the stuffing tastes so amazing that's the best part about being the cook the taste testing! Just to see the smiles on every body's faces is the best, slow down geezer here the best apple pie shine yet! Get you some of that! I brought an extra jug for each of you now don't go drinking it on the way home, Have a safe and wonderful THANKS GIVING YO ALL!:)
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 26, 2014 9:30:04 AM

Okay, hand me that magic marker again, will ya? What can we draw on him while he sleeps...

:::sounds of scribbling on beak:::

Voila! Behold my latest masterpiece! Chris is now a spittin' image of Izzy!!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 26, 2014 9:29:43 AM

Good Morning Geezers

Oh, but you've got the sexiest slow walk I've ever seen, Maggie. Heck, even Mrs BG commented quite favorably (and with a little jealousy). You got that certain flair that we all appreciate!

Duck don't need no decoratin', geezer! Put that magic marker back in the junk drawer. However, leave the bib off Chris.....I've never seen ducks drool, so this oughta be a first.

Pass the jug. I'm gonna get ready for tomorrow's feast!
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 25, 2014 11:57:51 PM

There is always more turkey NN, pass your plate my dear! Geezer I'am not yelling but I don't care for chitlins but I do like greens, besides my dear I did get your attention! BG I would rather wear something a little more comfortable, that Elvira dress makes me walk too slow! Shhh Cris is slepping, quick Geezer put on his red lobster bib to catch the drool! Have a good nite boys!:)
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northnut
All-Star Author Ontario

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Message Posted: Nov 25, 2014 1:51:37 PM

We've already had our Thanksgiving up here but I would still like more turkey....PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Chris46
Champion Author Dayton

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Message Posted: Nov 25, 2014 1:42:58 PM

:::grabs a chair at the banquet table:::
All set!
I want to be ready when the turkey is!
Now for a long nap!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 25, 2014 9:56:24 AM

Good Morning Geezers

What was that, geezer? I didn't git my hearin' aid in yet, and I'm curious about all that shoutin'! Is somethin' excitin' about to get goin'? We could use some excitement around here! Hey Maggie, how 'bout wearin' yer Elvira dress? That'll crank up these old tickers to the red line!

Pass the jug. I've gotta get ready for the upcoming excitement!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 25, 2014 8:46:55 AM

Why are you yellin', Mags? We're old, but we can still hear.
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 24, 2014 3:11:16 PM

NO CHITLINS FOR US HOW ABOUT COLlARD GREENS!:)
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 24, 2014 10:49:58 AM

Hey there North Nut. I think I know your brother, Left. He hangs with a rough crowd. (Use your imagination to fill in the rest.)

Chitlins! I sure am glad we're not havin' chitlins.
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 24, 2014 9:53:33 AM

Good Morning Geezers

Just pass the jug. I gotta get this new week started!
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 23, 2014 8:18:34 PM

Hello boys ohh a newbe NN welcome to the club you sound like you like to live dangerously I like that in a Geezer! Well guys this is our menu plan, Turkey stuffing sweat sour cabbage, green bean salad. and squash! Appetites are as follows dill dip, 4 different kinds of cheese and sausages, crackers and anything else you all can think of I will try once! Hey NN try and get that thru the 8-10 line and let me know your secret please! Oh my goodness I forgot the pies French vanilla, pumpkin and a sweat potato pie, ice cream on the side and yes we will retire to the fron room for the hootch I have a special blend for this year gentlemen and I promise to watch out for the pen artist and keep BG safe!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 23, 2014 3:42:34 PM

Howdy Geezers

Had a great festival and got lotsa pickin' and singin' in! But, ya know, yesterday when I woke up from my nap I found somebody had decorated me a bit. I just said to myself, mebbe it's time to head down to the jammin' rooms and see if anyone recognizes me. Well, they all did and the comments were less than charitable. I fled, and hadda borrow some of Mrs BG's makeup remover to get all that crap off. I'm not plannin' to nap in the clubhouse again!

Hey, welcome to the clubhouse, NN. Here take a pull on this jug and next time you'll waltze thru that line with 12 or 13 items.

Maggie if ya set it in front of us, we'll eat it!

Pass the jug. I gotta have a nip before I pass it off to Chris!
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northnut
All-Star Author Ontario

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Message Posted: Nov 23, 2014 1:35:22 PM

It feels good being a geezer. Today, I smuggled 11 items through the 10 items or less express line. Living on the edge man! Yeehhaaawwww
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Chris46
Champion Author Dayton

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Message Posted: Nov 23, 2014 1:07:23 PM

For appitizers, I like Varmit BBQ bites and hot Fried pickles. Then for the main course, its Riverside Catfish (heads removed), Lima Bean-Tater Gruel and Baked Cornmeal Puddin' and/or Grits is optional. Then I usually finish it off with Apple-Butter-Pumpkin-Pie with crushed Moonshine Mountain Brittle topping. Umm umm good!

Who's the beatnik?

BJ, you got time to pass me the hooch jug in between strummin'?
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 23, 2014 8:27:35 AM

I ain't adventurous when it comes to food, Mags. Turkey, stuffing, mashed 'taters an' a bunch of desserts does it for me.

Now....which hooch goes best with white meat? Lemme ponder.
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 22, 2014 11:30:06 PM

Hello boys how are you all. Ah BGI like the way you think, a little sassy never hurt anyone! Geezer nice art work with the pen, a beat nik I haven't seen one of them in a few years snicker snicker. I thought they were extinct did they go underground? Okay who's cooking what, I thought I would bring a sweet potato pie with the crunchy top to start with. I'm not sure what you men like to eat give me a few ideas and I'll see whats on hand and can be whipped into place!Hi chris and geezer you will have to tell me some of your favorites, besides the hooch. I'm here with my fav. shine sipping like a lady they will never find me here!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 22, 2014 10:43:32 AM

Okay, SHHHH! BG is nappin'. Hand me that magic marker. Good, now a few lines here, a few there and voila! BG looks like a beatnik! Hee, hee.
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 22, 2014 10:41:43 AM

Good Morning Geezers

Good jammin' last nite (and into early this am). I'm bushed! A sip of hooch or two and I'm gonna grab some shuteye.

Pass the jug. I gotta get ready for my nap!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 21, 2014 9:41:55 AM

Howdy Geezers

Indoor bluegrass festival this weekend. I will be there for the weekend! Stop by and I'll supply the hooch.

Pass the jug. I gotta get my fingers limbered up for pickin'!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 21, 2014 9:16:39 AM

Thanksgiving is next week, coots. Whose turn is it to cook this year?BG, you have a dirty mind. Way to go!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 20, 2014 2:48:48 PM

Good Afternoon Geezers

The possible comments on yer last posts could get me into real trouble, so I'll just mosey over to the corner with one of Maggie's jugs and have a sip or two. An' I'm plannin' to leave enuf fer Chris to join me.

Pass the jug. Chris and I are gonna do some drinkin'!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 20, 2014 9:30:32 AM

Which jug are you lookin' at, Magster?

I've never seen a duck with teeth, Chris. When you have 'em in is it tough to quack?
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Chris46
Champion Author Dayton

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Message Posted: Nov 19, 2014 11:43:33 PM

My teeth are chattering, and they aren't even in my mouth! I've had to suck hooch from a straw. Why, its so cold...... (Peanut gallery)...... "How cold is it"?...... Its colder than a lower back tat with a halter top on!
Pass the hooch, BJ, I've got my straw warmed up!
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 19, 2014 8:00:41 PM

Santa baby hurry on and see me tonight, around the christmas tree are those presents just for me? Oh this miracle hootch works like magic and warms your inner soul. So BG are you still there oh darn he's passed with the jug in his hand isn't that cute, geezer I heard that you all went to school with old man winter am so glad that you didn't turn too be as cold as he is. 12 below wind chill here so I am looking at the jug lovingly, can't hibernate I would miss my few sips in the evening It keeps me strong anf going. My grand mother use to have a shot of Irish whiskey every nite, she lived to be almost 98! I' will have to work hard to beat that record LOL. Chris your not frozen yet are you? Take care all and have a good nite!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 19, 2014 9:15:39 AM

An' I'm drinkin' to internal warming!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 18, 2014 10:16:27 AM

Howdy Geezers

Pass the jug. I'm drinkin' to global warming!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 18, 2014 9:20:05 AM

Mags, I grew up with Old Man Winter. Back then he was known by other names. Rugrat Winter, Little Bas***d Winter, etc. He was always a bit odd. Standoffish. Cold. He was married to Indian Summer for a short time, and the marriage lasted only long enough for Indian to have twin daughters, Autumn an' Spring. Indian Summer was quite the looker - she was hot!
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 17, 2014 9:48:30 PM

Howdy gentlemen, it is only 15 with a wind chill now below zero! Old man winter is here, guess he wont be retiring any time too soon. Hey geezer I bet if you shared some of your miracle hootch he would warm up and quit making it so cold here Maybe he would even smile! Don't worry about my tats I keep them covered in weather like this!Oh BG I think we will be getting a lot worse, and they say it will last longer. Hey I seen the sun shine today, we stopped for lunch at Popeye's good chicken! Her's looking at you kids!:)
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 17, 2014 9:53:04 AM

Howdy Geezers

19 degrees is cold, Maggie?????? We had a high of 9 with overnights dropping to around zero or slightly below. I'm really glad we've got all this global warming that's bein' forced on us. I'm sure it's helping with my heating bills and keeping me warmer than I wanna be! But, Miracle Hooch is the perfect anti-freeze and I intend to keep from freezing. It's nice, tho, to have January in November. That way we get it over with sooner.

Well, Santy, er, I mean geezer, I accept yer explanation and believe that the baby peed on yer leg. Didja ever consider puttin' a plastic sheet over yer lap? I guess the parents would prolly get cranky if they saw that 'cause we know their perfect kids would never pee on Santy!!!!

Pass the jug. I'm gonna have a sip with Maggie!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 17, 2014 8:53:49 AM

I'll have you know that the Ten Day Turtleneck Depends 'liminates the need for an undershirt, 'an they don't leak, so it was the baby who wet me.

Now, Whackadoodle has a set of underwear 'cause I'm told he has to wear suspenders to hold 'em up.

You be careful out there in the cold, Magatha. you don't want to get freezer burn on your, er, tats.
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 16, 2014 5:35:15 PM

Its not a set unless the T-Shirt matches along with socks! That is unless you wear designer depends, how about it Geezer? I heard about that little trickle running down your leg but I have no opinion. LOL So BG i have been known to be a little sassy once in a while, especially if someone is picking on ya all. Or no I can't talk about that! Wackiness get with the program and speak up or just have a few slugs of this and you'll fit right in darling! Geezer I agree no babies unless mom or dad wants to get in the picture the way your high and dry! Hi Chris where our you my darling I haven't heard from you in ages and I was missing your sweet talks. EWell Guys its snowing again and I will have to put on my snow pants as its just down right cold out there 19 degrees! Have a great evening and don't forget....
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 16, 2014 11:32:47 AM

Howdy Geezers

Jeez, geezer, ya take all the fun outa my fantasizing 'bout Maggie's, er, tats. She brings a bit of civilization and decorum to this clubhouse, but has that potentially wild side! Just what we old farts need!!!

I walked in just after ya claimed that baby peed on ya last year. As I recall, there was some speculation about overflowing D E P E N D S. Since I made my way over to the bar immediately I never heard how it was resolved. Now, 'fess up geezer..........what's the real skinny?

Pass the jug. I gotta ponder whether or not Santy wears a "pair" or a "set" of undies!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 16, 2014 8:19:11 AM

Asked that question before, you have, Whackimoto. Here, take a pull on this jug and ponder no longer.
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wackiness
Champion Author San Bernardino

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Message Posted: Nov 16, 2014 2:06:30 AM

Question Oh Honored One

Why is a pair of undies called a pair when there's only one set?
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 15, 2014 8:42:51 AM

Ho, ho, ho! Uh, just practicin' to be Santy Claus. No babies this year! Last year one of 'em sat on my lap an' peed on my leg an' the parents said I wet the baby!

I'll also be needin' two or three youngish female helpers. Chris, set up the interviews, will ya? I hear there are some good candidates down at the cheerleaders school.

BG, quit starin' at Maggie's, er, tats.
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 14, 2014 11:58:41 PM

Hello Boys how be ya all, I sure hope this finds you all well. Busy today doctor appts, and tests have to go back to the doctor Tuesday at 7am. Will have to set the alarm I don't like getting up so early. Its hard enough some days just to get up especially if I'm having a good dream or a late night snicker. Oh BGJ who are a siver tongued little devil bless your heart! Don't worry I took all the classes on reviving all who need it! Geezer who is going to be Santa at the club house, how about some games for the grand kids and maybe a prize for the winner what cha think? I mean you always come up with good ideas, we the (ladies) could bake up some goodies for us all! Well boys its getting late talk at ya later and try to have a good night!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 14, 2014 10:43:04 AM

Good Morning Geezers

I'd be mesmerized just observing Maggie's tats, 'speshly while she's wearin' her Elvira dress! Maggie, ya gotta be careful 'bout lookin' so good around here......I'm not sure our old hearts can take it.

Pass the jug. I'm gonna ponder MERMAIDS!
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Chris46
Champion Author Dayton

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Message Posted: Nov 14, 2014 10:09:40 AM

Sailors ask for it by name!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 14, 2014 9:10:12 AM

Mermaid Hooch - It slides smoothly down your throat and leaves you mesmerized.

[Edited by: geezer at 11/14/2014 9:10:37 AM EST]
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Chris46
Champion Author Dayton

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Message Posted: Nov 13, 2014 11:26:09 PM

Hey Maggie! Maybe we were there the same time? Did you ever dress up as a mermaid? Just asking...
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magpie2013
Champion Author Milwaukee

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Message Posted: Nov 13, 2014 5:39:49 PM

My tattoo is that of an Indian head ban that my father made for me, and in the center is a dream catcher. But i exercise pretty regular to keep my shape, you never know what's out there. And this way I can wear my Elvira dress every once in a while! Casablanca oh those were the days, just put your lips together and blow! What a line wish I would have thought of that one!
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Chris46
Champion Author Dayton

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Message Posted: Nov 13, 2014 11:28:59 AM

Darn! I took a bath this morning, and my tat's came off! I guess I was only dreaming the night in Casablanca, when I got the mermaid on my arm!
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 13, 2014 10:57:23 AM

Howdy Geezers

I never got a tatoo so I cain't participate in this little exercise. I'd rather look at new Miracle Hooch (and drink it!) than look at old faded body art. So....

Pass the jug. I'm gonna taste new hooch and try to tell how old it is!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 13, 2014 9:11:24 AM

My wife had a tattoo of a bunch of grapes put on when she was young and into wine. Now the tattoo looks like a box of raisins and all she does is whine about it.
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Chris46
Champion Author Dayton

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Message Posted: Nov 12, 2014 11:50:17 PM

Geezer, the last time I saw that copy of Playcoot, it was in the outhouse. Reading material, you know.
Hey! Let's play a game of "Guess what my tatoo used to be"! Great fun and a barrel of laughs!
Pass the hooch BJ, I got to get my pump primed.
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BGJam
Champion Author Twin Cities

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Message Posted: Nov 12, 2014 12:13:12 PM

Good Morning Geezers

Yup, it's good to get together with the jug here in this clubhouse! I kinda like the lack of requirements, 'cept for bein' old.

Pass the jug. I'm gonna enjoy my dottage!
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geezer
Champion Author Albany

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Message Posted: Nov 12, 2014 9:10:15 AM

The clubhouse at the golf course had 10% off for veterans, but when I went up to buy a round it was Happy Hour, and the Happy Hour prices were cheaper....

Here at our clubhouse, drinks are always free for veterans....because we veterans are the ones who make the hooch and, well, drinks are free for everyone, anyway.
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